Ina Garten reveals she separated from husband Jeffrey after launching her cooking empire because he had….see more
Ina Garten has revealed that she briefly separated from her husband after launching her cooking empire because he ‘expected’ her to play a ‘certain role’ and felt she wasn’t ‘paying enough attention to him.’
On the outside, it has looked as though Ina’s 56-year marriage to Jeffrey has been picture perfect every step of the way.
But now, the acclaimed cook and author, 76, has revealed that she and her 77-year-old husband split up in the 1970s, when she was just starting out in her career.
The Barefoot Contessa star told People that her husband had certain ‘expectations’ of her, which she found ‘really annoying.’
‘He expected a wife that would make dinner,’ she said. ‘There were certain roles that we played, and I found them really annoying.’
Ina and Jeffrey married in 1968, and at the time, she working as the White House budget analyst.
But in 1978, she left her government job and purchased a food store in New York called Barefoot Contessa.
In an excerpt of her upcoming memoir, Be Ready When the Luck Happens, Ina explained that after she started running her own business, she realized she couldn’t ‘live with him in the traditional “man and wife” relationship anymore.’
‘When I bought Barefoot Contessa, I shattered our traditional roles – took a baseball bat to them and left them in pieces,’ she wrote.
‘While I was still cooking, cleaning, shopping, managing at the store, I was doing it as a businesswoman, not a wife.
‘I just couldn’t live with him in a traditional “man and wife” relationship. Jeffrey hadn’t done anything wrong.
‘He was just doing what every man before him had done. But we were living in a new era, and that behavior wasn’t OK with me anymore. I had changed.’
The 76-year-old admitted that her immense ‘responsibilities’ as a storeowner made it ‘impossible for her to even think about anything else, and she confessed that she ‘didn’t pay enough attention’ to her husband.
‘There was no expectation about who got home from work first and what they should do, because I never got home from work,’ she continued.
‘I didn’t pay enough attention to him. I just wanted everyone to leave me alone so I could concentrate on the store.
‘Jeffrey was fully formed and living the life he wanted to live. I wasn’t, and I wouldn’t be able to figure out who I was or what I wanted unless I was on my own. I needed that freedom.’
Ina revealed that she considered divorcing Jeffrey, but in the end, opted for a separation as she took time to figure out what she really wanted.
In the tome, she described it as the ‘hardest thing she ever did,’ but stressed the importance of her ‘being on her own.’
‘I didn’t say whether it was for now… or forever. In true Jeffrey form, he said, “If you feel like you need to be on your own, you need to do it,”‘ she recalled.
‘He packed his bag and went home to Washington with no plan to come back. I buried my emotions and threw myself into my work.’
In the end, Ina suggested that Jeffrey see a therapist, and he agreed, which changed everything for them.
They spent six weeks apart before they ultimately decided to give their love another go as ‘equals.’
‘Jeffrey’s willingness to see the therapist was as significant as anything that might happen during their session,’ Ina added.
‘He was that determined to convince me he was serious about making our marriage work.
‘Six weeks passed. We talked, we listened, and more important, we heard each other when we aired our concerns.
Moving forward, we could be equals who took care of each other. It wouldn’t happen overnight, but if we worked toward the same goal, we could change things together.’
For more than two decades, Ina grew Barefoot Contessa into a booming business, before releasing her first cookbook in 1999.
It was a rousing success and launched her into mega stardom within the culinary world.
She then began making frequent appearances on Martha Stewart’s show before landing her own Food Network program, called Barefoot Contessa, in 2002.
Since then, Ina has released a whopping 13 cookbooks in total and has embarked on a slew of other business endeavors; her show went on for 29 seasons before coming to an end in 2021.
Since their brief separation, Jeffrey has been by her side through it all, and they’re still happily in love now, decades on.
On his 77th birthday last November, Ina shared a touching tribute to him.
‘Happy birthday to my darling husband Jeffrey. I’ve loved you madly for almost 60 years and I’m just getting started,’ she gushed.
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